The Longest Swim

Diana Nyad, Hall of Fame long distance swimmer, sports commentator and recently turned 60, announced she will swim from Cuba to Florida next month. She had tried this swim before and failed, due to rough seas and wind, but this time she said she would stay in the water until her feet hit Florida, no matter what. That could be 36 to 60+ hours depending on conditions. When asked why she was doing it, she said it was a feat waiting to be conquered and while she wanted to redeem her previous attempt, it was less about being able to say WHAT she had done than measuring WHO she had become. She blamed it on "the urgency of 60" which recently hit her. There is a point, she said, when living forever is no longer a given and you start to see people run out of time to do what they are capable of. Sure, she might make it to age 80 or more, but plenty of folks don't - through no fault of their own. She was taking control of her destiny.

Lance heard this news interview driving through the mountains of western Maryland toward Rocky Gap Conference Center and Resort near Cumberland. He was booked for a week at the resort - Monday through Wednesday on his own and Thursday and Friday while facilitating the annual Criminal Justice/Western Maryland session of Leadership Maryland. It was this longstanding gig that briefly brought him in off the sabbatical road. For years, he had been coming out here and always wanted to have a couple of days to just relax and enjoy the beautiful sit like a normal hotel guest. Now he could.

Besides, Western Maryland was a touchstone of his childhood years, often camping with his parents and later camping with ManCamp, a bonding weekend with his own sons and male in-laws always at Swallow Falls State Park. In adulthood, the region was home to some of his most cherished leadership workshop experiences at sites like Wisp Ski Lodge, Rocky Gap and Savage River Lodge. He practically felt like a native and boasted many friends from Garrett, Allegany and Washington Counties from these programs. When he told people he was "a mountain and lakes kinda guy", the specific picture in his mind was this very view outside his dining room windows. A fading sunset over a silver lake bounded by dark mountains. Lance felt at home here.

And then, all the lights went out. The entire hotel was plunged into darkness. Twenty retired businessmen at the next table proceeded to get drunk on wine comped by the hotel. Lance moved to a pool of emergency generator run lights in the bar, as much for quiet as for illumination. As Lance gazed out into the total darkness of the night, he thought he felt, more than heard, God saying, "Ya wanna think deep thoughts? Fine. Lights out. No excuses now, buddy."

Then he remembered the Diana Nyad interview. Lance realized that awakening to mortality, that change of focus from WHAT he had accomplished in his life to discovering WHO he had become, resonated completely with the true spirit of his journey. He was in search of himself in the present so he could find his next adventure by looking ahead, not backward. His journey wasn't about writing his own obit, it was about launching the next phase of life with new wisdom, hope and passion.

What would his "Cuba to Florida swim" be?

He could build upon what he had already done for the last 30 years but stretch it, bend it, and take it to a whole new scale of impact. Or, he could start something entirely different, an enterprise going in a brand new direction perhaps built alongside colleagues who were also ready to move on from their success to new frontiers. He already knew who they were. Or, he could design a family-operated business that could sweep some of his children into productive careers while leaving them a legacy of creativity, a strong work ethic and maybe even some assets for when he was no longer there to provide. Or, he could finally create that Conference Center on a Mountain, the one he could envision and describe in the smallest of detail, the one that had haunted his dreams since he was in high school. A long held, always tomorrow dream of his.

If not now, when? If not him, who? (Ugh. Lance thought. What a Degrassie cliche!)

There, looking into the pitch black windows now turned into vast mirrors reflecting only the glow of the emergency lights in the exits, Lance knew none of this was an accident. He had taken the right road at the right time of his life. He had pushed off from the shore where he had stood pondering for so very long and was finally swimming northward in full expectation of his ability to go the whole way. Lance now knew that one day his feet would touch the sand of that distant shore and he would discover the next new land he was destined to find. Not if, just when. And at that moment, the hotel lights came on. No kidding.

Post Script: When asked where her mind went during those endless hours battling the rolling waves, stroke after stoke, breath after breath, alone in the inky darkness, Diana Nyad said she mentally sang the theme song to the Beverly Hillbilly's, literally 2,000 times in a row. She counted.

Lance decided he, too, needed a song for the road. But definitely not that one.